One Night Stand

You’re at a social event and you finally gathered enough nerve to approach the longhaired brunette with the buns of steel. To your absolute shock and elation, she actually treated you like a good-natured man and not a salivating monster.

As you begin getting comfortable (as does she), you begin to realize that she may actually be flirting with you. If you didn’t know better, you could swear that this tanned, toned tamale will be running her nails down your back that same night in sheer pleasure and agony.

Which leads me to today’s sex tip: how can you ensure that a one-night stand can garnish you with the reputation of a Don Juan, while making your momentary madam feel like a princess? Follow these little morsels of information and any woman will consider herself lucky to be in your hands (as well as having you present yourself within ).

First and foremost, I recommend that before you go out, you take a very deep cleansing shower and scrub everywhere . Get into all those little nooks and crannies, especially if you want your sidekick to enjoy giving you a tongue-lashing experience. Oh yeah, and try not to sweat up a storm at the club either.

Make sure that your hands are washed, you smell good and for goodness sake, chew some minty gum… it can make a world of difference.

Now, depending on what she’s been up to that night, going downtown to pay her privates a visit is somewhat dicey. If she’s been sweatin’ to the oldies like a wild woman, then I don’t recommend that you open wide for a taste of the gravy train — it won’t be very tantalizing. If you’re at a motel, bring her into the shower with you or better yet, the Jacuzzi. That way you’ll both come out clean and enjoy each other’s bodies enthusiastically.

If you don’t live alone or worse, you live with your parents, then don’t bring her to your place. She won’t be comfortable no matter how tipsy she is. The whole point of a one-night stand is to ensure a wild evening of passion, rather than having to shush one another the entire way through.

As I mentioned with personal hygiene before, make sure your place is clean and tidy before you leave the house. There’s nothing that can ruin the moment like your lady watching you remove half of your wardrobe off the bed — not exactly a sexual mood enhancer if you know what I mean.

Also, make sure that your favorite music is already in the CD player for easy access. And you should also have alcohol handy in order to make her a drink — and I’m not referring to a brewskie).

If you guys already began your sexual adventure in the car on the way to your place, then screw the music (not literally) and once you open the door to your house, put her up against the wall and kiss her as though she’s water and you’ve been stuck on a desert for 4 years. Women love spontaneity, but don’t begin ravishing her right away.

Foreplay is important even if it may be the last time you ever see her (depending on how good it is, of course). Even if all you want to do is penetrate her into oblivion, remember that this is your chance to be creative and make her delve into kinky aspects of herself that she never knew existed.

Don’t end up crouching on your couch with your elbow cutting off the circulation in her arm. Make sure you’re in a space that is comfortable and roomy so that you can maneuver freely. Places like the bed, a covered floor and even a nice dining room table are adequate. Now you both know that you’re ultimately going to have sex, so I recommend that you delay penetration until she tells you, or rather begs you, to penetrate her.

Kiss her mouth, lick her neck, bite her back, chew her hips, and nibble on her breasts for as long as you can. Don’t completely neglect her vagina, however, instead use your fingers on her clitoris to hit that G-spot that we all love so much. The idea is to treat her body as though it was specifically designed for you. You can lightly outline the silhouette of her body and then hold on to her hips while you lift her up to kiss her tummy. She’ll be begging for it, trust me.

Now I don’t want to hear any arguments on this one — you must absolutely, positively use protection at all times. Even if she claims she’s on the Pill, you still have to wear a condom because there’s a lot more potential damage available than just a baby.

STDs are horrible and can even lead to death, and no night of passion is worth your funeral. I apologize for my bluntness, but I have to ensure that you understand that although a one-night stand is all about fun, you shouldn’t have to worry about the possible dire consequences the morning after.

Sex with a stranger can definitely be enticing, if not erotic as hell. But considering that you don’t really know the depth of the person your sharing your sperm with (not mentally at least), you’ll never really know what fulfills her. If she’s a vocal woman who makes specific demands, then I guess I’ll just have to eat my words.

Now, it’s quite likely that she’s aware that this is probably no more than just an orgasmic night of gratification, so you don’t need to say things like, “I hope you know, this means nothing,” or even, “I’ll call you in the morning.” Don’t say anything at all about what it is or where it’s heading; she’s not stupid. If she asks, then be honest, but otherwise, just enjoy the moment.

Considering it’s a one-night thing, why not make it as kinky, crazy and fulfilling as possible — for both you and her? But be careful, because after you use these helpful tips I have provided, what you thought was a one-night stand may turn into 9 Weeks .

Until next time, keep yourself clean and get ready to get dirty.

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